The first semester
of my freshman year here at Clark, my Spanish professor asked the class how many
feminists were in the room. Out of a class of 17, maybe 3 people raised their
hands. Everyone looked shy and uncomfortable. A few people (myself included)
raised their hand about halfway, making the wishy-washy-kinda-sorta hand
movement.
She then asked,
“What if I told you that the word feminism means that women should be considered
equal to men? It’s just about equality.”
When she then posed
the question again, everyone in the room raised their hand.
Why are we so
hesitant to use the word “feminist” these days? Why are there so many negative
connotations to the word?
Feminism seems to be
tied to sexuality, specifically homosexuality, which then brings out another set
of prejudices. Having been called a “dyke” several times, simply for stating that
I had a minor in women’s studies, as if my studies were linked to my sexuality,
it’s no wonder that I’d shy away from the word.
If you choose to use
the label “feminist,” you have to prepare yourself for a fight. You have to defend the
title, and your position on any number of topics: sexuality, abortion,
gay-marriage, economics, etc. To be a feminist means to constantly fight. And I love a fight as
much as the next person! But some days, it would be nice to be able to get by
without having to fight for a term that, if most people knew the correct
definition for it, wouldn’t contest or fight over it either!
But at the same
time, I think feminism takes on a pretty personal definition. So what is feminism to
me?
To my friend
Bridget, feminism is the jell insole she puts in the bottom of her high heeled
shoes to help her get around campus on her busy days without her feet killing at
the end of the day.
To me, feminism is
realizing that if a woman wants to wear those high heeled shoes, she damn well
may without being scrutinized for it.
And if she chooses to wear a pair of black low
rise converses at her high school graduation because she can’t walk in heels
without looking like a baby giraffe…well that’s alright too!
Statistically, women
are less likely to participate in conversations where men are
present. They
are also likely to preface their statements in class with, “This may sound like
a stupid question, but…” or “I’m sorry, but…”
To me, feminism is
making a community where women’s voices are heard equally. To me, feminism is about not
apologizing for having a question or for making my voice heard.
In the CNN news
coverage on the Steubenville Rape trial, they declared that the tragedy in the
courtroom was the ruination of the two very promising futures of the star
football players.
To me, feminism is
about seeing the tragedy in a 16 year old girl being gang raped, filmed and
photographed, then having it circulated over the internet, and being called a
slut for it.
A lot of people
think feminism is an exclusive ideology, only one for women to participate in,
where women are promoted over men.
To me, feminism
includes many different viewpoints, in many different contexts, with an
underlying principle of equality. It’s about realizing that I don’t agree with all women all
the time. And
I don’t hate men, nor believe in superiority of one sex over
another.
I don't feel like the stereotypical demonized version of a feminist: Idon’t want to burn
my bra on the front law; I don’t feel like cutting my hair short and getting neck
tattoos; I
don’t feel like a slut “who’s asking for it.”
I know how to cook; I’m pretty good at
crocheting and sewing. I get offended when I'm told I'm being emotional, as if emotion were the opposite of reason and exclusive to women. I like dressing up nice and going out with my friends.
And if I wanted to cut my hair short, burn my bra, and get a neck tattoo, then that's okay too: It doesn't make me any more or less of a feminist.
To me, feminism is
my mother: a woman who is a secretary, used to own a motorcycle, yells at the TV
during a Bruins game, is the best cook/cross-stitcher I know. My mother, who let her daughter wear her black converses at her high school graduation instead of forcing her to wear high heels like all the other mothers.
